This is the story of how I was outed by a psychic. First, a little backstory.
Out of my 5 siblings, the one that I have always connected with the most is my sister Misty. We’re different in so many ways, but we connect on all the levels of awesomeness! She and I have a dangerously dry sense of humor. We also both tend to not really give a rip about what others think of us, and when we get together to kiki…the tea always gets spilled. A lot of tea is spilled.
One interesting way that our lives mirror each other is that we both married someone of the opposite gender before marrying someone of the same gender. Yep. We are both gay and proud. Although we share the same sexuality, our paths to coming out were quite different. Misty came to realize her true preferences well into her adulthood, whereas I knew I was gay before my 10th birthday. Growing up in Southern Indiana in the ’80s and ’90s generates a fair amount of confusion, shame, and guilt! Needless to say, I remained closeted throughout my youth and young adulthood. Very very closeted.
After the First Outing
I consider my unceremonious and extremely public booting from the Navy for having a relationship with a shipmate as my first time being outed. It was a traumatic life event for sure. Even though the experience did give me a glimpse of what living as a gay man is like, it was more than awful enough to send me even further into the closet.
After being separated from the Navy, I returned to my hometown of Evansville, Indiana. I made it a point not to discuss the details of my discharge. Lying about it was not an option for me either. When asked about it, I would simply reply with, “I don’t want to talk about it”. As you can imagine, this piqued curiosities even more than before. Family members started putting ‘two and two’ together and suspicions about my sexuality arose.
One of the first people to start dropping hints and making peculiar comments was my sister Misty. It didn’t surprise me at all that she figured it out. After all, her and I basically share a brain. I knew in my soul that she was a safe place for the truth. I could’ve told her early on and she would’ve been 100% supportive from the jump. The problem was that I was not ready to deal with this truth myself. So I did not come out to my sister at that point. It would be another year or two of her knowing and me knowing that she knows and her knowing that I know that she knows and so on.
4th of July: A Good Day for a Psychic Reading
There I was, sitting at home, alone on 4th of July (2002). It was a humid and cloudy day in Southern Indiana. I was feeling a bit lonely and the gloom had made its way into my second floor apartment. I had nowhere to go celebrate and my phone had been eerily inactive all day. As the afternoon wore on and my loneliness grew, I received an unexpected call from one of my favorite people. As I answered with my standard “hello”, I heard that all to familiar “hey bub”. It was a much welcomed call to receive. Especially in that moment of feeling sorry for myself.
Quickly into the call, Misty cut to the chase and asked the million-dollar question. That question that so many closeted gay men fear having to answer. As she prepped me for the big question, my mind raced to think of how I would answer. Before I could compose my thoughts, she asked it. “Bub, do you want to go get a psychic reading with me today?” WHEW! I was so relieved that she didn’t ask me if I was gay that I quickly answered, “yes”. It wasn’t until after the appointment was set and Misty was in route to my westside apartment that a new fear set in. What if we are read at the same time? What if this psychic is legit? Am I about to be outed by a psychic?
On Our Way to the Psychic Outing
The possibility of a psychic bringing up my sexuality or details about my dating life didn’t occur to me until I had already agreed to do it. Once that set in, I was having one of those “oh shit” moments. I just wasn’t ready to face this truth with members of my family. Heck, I hadn’t yet admitted it to myself!
Unfortunately for me, Misty was on her way to scoop me up. I would soon be in a room with my sister and a psychic that could potentially have access to every deep dark secret that I had! Once I was in my sister’s car, I knew that it was just a short 10 minute drive down Green River Rd. to the office of Madame Faye. I was tense. This particular psychic was well known and had been offering intuitive readings for many many years. I assumed she was legit, but secretly hoped that she was a total fraud. In that case, I would be more than happy to pay her what ever she charged and walk out unscathed.
As we made a right turn onto Washington Avenue, I knew that we had about two blocks and one u-turn to go. We were a few short moments away from my inevitable and unscheduled coming out party! I can remember it like it happen yesterday. I took a deep breath as my sister pulled the car to the right side of the street and we landed in the gravel parking lot of Psychic Readings by Madame Faye. We parked right in front of the sign. It looked very official. I knew this lady was the real deal.
Here We Go
Once we entered the home/studio, we were greeted by Madame Faye herself. I don’t remember if we had called ahead or not, but either way, she seemed to be expecting us. She informed us that the cost for each of us would be $40 and that we had the option to be read privately or we could both be in the same room. What? It appeared that I had a way out. An easy way out of being outed.
No sooner than I began to form my lips to assert my ‘get out of jail free’ card, Misty informed the fortune teller that we would be getting our readings together. I was crushed. Hope of escaping this awkward and undesired situation was eliminated. As Madame Faye showed us to the reading room, I reluctantly followed. Misty and I sat there in the dimly lit room. Misty was sitting to my left and the Madame was sitting about 4 or 5 feet in front of us. It was time to find out if today was the day that Misty learned my truth. Yes; she already knew at that time, but it wasn’t a truth that I had admitted to yet.
My Fear is Confirmed
Of course my sister received her reading first. I am not sure if I decided that order of things, but now I know that was a bad idea. It was a bad idea because I sat in that little black banquet chair for about 20 minutes and Madame Faye proved that she is indeed a very very…very gifted psychic. It was a torturous 20 minutes. This lady knew everything from my sister’s medical issues to legal situations to details surrounding our father’s recent passing. Yikes! She was so spot on with everything. At one point, it seemed like she was just showing off. It was a masterclass in psychic readings and my closeted gay ass was next.
Misty’s psychic reading had finally concluded. It was now my turn to face the firing squad. A one-woman, intuitive firing squad. Here we go!
My reading started off a bit slowly. Madame Faye brought forth a few messages that seemed like vague psychic fodder. I was quite happy about the vagueness, but I was also confused by it. There was absolutely nothing vague about the messages she provided for my sister. Even with the slow start, I remained tense and fearful about what was about to be revealed. The reading continued and so did my confusion.
Surprisingly, the cloudiness of the reading continued. It was like Madame Faye read my sister and then switched out with a psychic stand-in for my reading. It was night and day. There were a few things that came up that seemed to fit, but then she would mix in details that didn’t make sense. Before I knew it, the gifted psychic wrapped up my reading and informed us that we could meet her at the desk and pay up. What the hell? What just happened? At that moment, I had forgotten all about my fear of being outed. Now I was just plain offended.
A Psychic Smackdown
The readings were concluded. Madame Faye had done her thing. I was still cowering in the closet. All was well…right? Nope. As Misty and Ms. Faye were preparing to stand and walk to that payment counter, I remained seated. It quickly became visible to both of them that I had some unfinished business. Before they could lift from their chairs, I blurted out, “whoa, whoa…wait.” I immediately launched into my impulsive grievances about my lackluster psychic reading. “Why was my reading so vague and short?” I asked. “You read my sister really well and gave a lot of specifics.”
Okay, so this outburst was not well received by the Madame. I remember a stern look coming my way. It was a look that my own mother had given me a few times when I was out of line. I braced myself for her response.
Outed but not Outed
As she began her retort, she simultaneously lifted her hand and pointed in my direction. “Listen”, she demanded. “You are very hard to read!” She seemed annoyed and I was once again fearful. This time for a different reason. Ms. Faye continued, “you are guarded and there is something that you don’t want to be revealed!” Oh…my…god! I knew that I had messed up. I had poked the bear. Why though?
I could have just paid the lady and left, but no, I needed to be heard. While I was mortified at this moment, Misty, seemed to find a great deal of amusement in the situation. She knew exactly what was happening the WHOLE time. Misty knew the precious “secret” that I was guarding. She knew. My sister was enjoying every single minute of seeing me sweat and squirm. So, it appears that she got a bit of a ‘2 for 1’. Misty received an amazing psychic reading and got to see me dance. Good for her.
Time to Go
I now had received my reading, low-key outing, and a smack-down from Madame Faye. It appeared that I had completed the trifecta. It was definitely time for us to go. As soon as the lambasting from the psychic lady was done, I quickly stood up, thanked her for the wonderful reading, paid her, and left. I didn’t need to hear any more. Misty and I walked to the car and off we went.
As you can probably imagine, the ride to my apartment was slightly awkward. It was what wasn’t revealed during the reading that was the elephant in the room/car. My favorite sibling and I were back to the cycle of “I know that you know and you know that I know that you know”…and so on. This cycle would continue for about 2-3 more years before I would officially announce my homosexuality to my misty and my dad’s side of the family. As I previously suspected, they all knew, no one really cared, and they were all extremely supportive.
Is it Possible to be Outed by a Psychic?
Is it possible? The short answer is yes. Yes, it is possible. In the way that anything is “possible.” Although it is possible, I have learned from this particular experience and through my own work that it is unlikely. The truth is that even the most dialed-in psychic can be blocked by a guarded sitter.
When I read someone, it is their own energy that I am tapping into. I always ask permission from the sitter to connect. Even though they verbally give me permission, they don’t always give me full access. If there is something they don’t want brought forward, that information will be sealed off. That is what happened when I allowed Madame Faye to read me. I only allowed her partial access. When a sitter does this, the overall reading will be affected. It is likely that the reader will have a more difficult time bringing forth messages. It is also likely that the information coming through may be general or lack clarity.
At the end of the day, even the best psychic reader is subject to the level of connection that their sitter permits them to have. The unfortunate reality is that the reader often gets the blame for the lackluster reading. That is exactly what I attempted to do. I give props to Madame Faye for standing her ground and telling me how it is. I am thankful for the experience, the lesson that I learned, and the funny story that I have to tell.